Performance Anxiety
The 90-Second Grounding Reset
When anxiety hits, your brain leaves your body and starts narrating: 'Is it working? Is she bored? Am I losing it?' Grounding pulls attention back to physical sensation, which directly interrupts the loop.
Your worksheet
Type your answers below. Nothing is sent anywhere — everything stays on this device.
When you're finished, we'll prompt you to take a screenshot so you have your work to keep.
Step 1 of 5
Name 5 things you see
Out loud or silently. The lamp. The crease in the sheet. Your partner's hand. The window. The clock.
Step 2 of 5
Name 4 things you feel
The texture of the sheet. The temperature of the air. Your back on the mattress. The weight of your own arm.
Step 3 of 5
Name 3 things you hear
The fan. Your breathing. A car outside.
Step 4 of 5
Slow exhale, twice as long as inhale
Breathe in 4 counts. Out 8 counts. Twice.
Step 5 of 5
Return to one point of contact
Pick one place you and your partner are touching. Put all your attention there. Just that.
Things to remember
- This is for in-the-moment use. Practice it once before you need it.
- It's totally okay to pause sex for 90 seconds. 'Hold on, I want to reset' is sexy, not awkward.
- If anxiety is chronic, grounding is a tool - not a cure. Therapy treats the root.
0 of 5 filled in
See the full library of free intimacy exercises or take a free sex therapy self-assessment.